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Original Air Date:August 7, 1997
Guest Stars:Judy Tenuta, Bobcat Goldthwait

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(Opening theme & titles)

Tansut: Greetings, this is Tansut, welcoming you to the first ever Space Ghost Coast to Coast 37th show anniversary celebration spectacular-mathon. Tonight, funny man Bobcat Goldthwait, and funny woman Judy Tenuta. And now, your friend and mine, that ghost host with the most, Spaaace Ghooost!

Space Ghost: (invisos in, coughing) Greetings, TV-watching citizens! I am Space Ghost, and I'm tickled pink to be here!

Zorak: Tickled stupid, you mean.

Space Ghost: (stares at Zorak, sniffs) Before we begin, let me introduce you to the director of tonight's festivities, that fabulous hot rock himself, Moltar!

Audience: (applause)

Moltar: Hey, don't get up, really.

Space Ghost: And, over here, we have my band leader, and indentured mantis-servant, Zorak, and the Original Way Outs! (Way Outs play a synthesized excerpt from "William Tell Overature") And we'd like to welcome you to... (takes deep breath) The first ever Space Ghost anniversary spectacular-mathon, uh, show.

Zorak: Whoop de doodle do!

Space Ghost: You know, kids, tonight is a special notch in the belt that is the Space Ghost saga.

Zorak: Ehhh, Space Ghost, what anniversary is this, anyway?

Space Ghost: Weren't you listening, Zorak? It's my 37th show anniversary! (smile sparkles)

Zorak: I never heard of anybody celebrating their 37th anniversary before! It's dopey.

Space Ghost: It's not dopey! It's our 37th show! That's an anniversary, right? Darn tootin' it is! So, hap-hap-happy anniversary it is, and shut up Zorak, because you're not gonna rain on my charade.

Tansut: Well, I don't know what I'm doing here, either.

Zorak: (looks around)

Space Ghost: (looks around)

Tansut: (in recording booth, behind a window) They called me twenty minutes ago, shoved these notes in my hand, what do they expect? (microphone feedback increases in volume) Buncha morons!

Moltar: Uh, Tansut?

Tansut: Let 'em fire me, I don't care.

Moltar: Tansut?

Tansut: What?

Moltar: Uh, your mike's on, man.

Tansut: Ohhhhh, fluff! Nobody showed me how to do this! (feedback increases again) (finally turns microphone off)

Space Ghost: Oh-kay! Let's get on with it, shall we? (invisos to desk, with new music) (Ding dong!) Say, I wonder who that could be?

Moltar: It's your first anniversary guest, Space Ghost, funny lady Judy Tenuta (she appears on control room monitor)

Judy Tenuta: I'm ready, honey!

Space Ghost: Judy! Welcome back to the show!

Judy Tenuta: Oh-h-h-h-h-h! Space Ghost! I'm so excited!

Space Ghost: Me too!

Zorak: Oooh! Me too!

Space Ghost: So, Judy gal, what have you been doing since I last saw you?

Judy Tenuta: Oh! Space Ghost, as you know, I rule the western hemisphere!

Space Ghost: That's nice, must keep you busy.

Judy Tenuta: (plays accordion and sings) I rule, I rule, I rule.

Space Ghost: Uh, Judy...

Judy Tenuta: Yeah!?

Space Ghost: Stuff a sock in it, Tenuta.

Judy Tenuta: (dances with accordion, to weird background sound)

Space Ghost: Judy, I've asked you to come back to celebrate my anniversary with me! Now, celebrate!

Judy Tenuta: Ohhh...

Space Ghost: Don't sing, Judy.

Judy Tenuta: (plays accordion and sings) Happy anniversary, happy anniversary, happy anniversary, Spaaaace Ghost! Oh-h-h-h-h-h! (spins around)

Space Ghost: (grimaces)

Judy Tenuta: Look at this! (swings her accordion up with her chest, then sits down)

Zorak: Must I?

Judy Tenuta: I can make myself invisible. You cannot see me now! (puts her hands in front of her face)

Space Ghost: Uh, yes I can.

Judy Tenuta: No-o-o-o-o! You cannot...

Space Ghost: Yes I can! (aims his power bands at monitor)

Judy Tenuta: No! His rays cannot harm me, no-o-o!

Space Ghost: (lowers his power bands, sighs)

Judy Tenuta: (shaking her head back and forth, singing) Hair dance, hair dance, don't be a square, dance! Hair dance!

Space Ghost: (stares back silently)

Judy Tenuta: (full face on monitor, puckering for Space Ghost) (Smoooooch!)

Space Ghost: Hmmm. Okay, I think it's time for Judy Jetson here to blast off.

Moltar: Gotcha. (throws lever to send her away)

Judy Tenuta: (still on studio monitor) Oh, you pig!

Space Ghost: Aaah! Moltar!

Moltar: I know, I know. (throws more levers, control room monitor changes several times, finally shows Tansut's booth)

Tansut: Uh, excuse me. Are we going to commercial now?

Space Ghost: No!

Tansut: Oh, sorry, don't mind me. (Moltar throws lever, control room monitor shows static)

Space Ghost: (Ding dong!) Aha! Our next guest! (sniff sniff sniff sniff) Hey! I smell evil!

Moltar: Space Ghost...

Chad Ghostal: (evil laugh)

Moltar: ... It's your evil twin brother.

Space Ghost: Aaaaah! Can't talk, Chad, I have a hernia!

Chad Ghostal: Hey hey, relax, baby, like, I'm not here to spread terror.

Zorak: Rats!

Chad Ghostal: I just wanted to swing by and check out the old Ghost Pad. You know, I had a real blast the last time I saw you, Taddles. A real blast. (evil laugh)

Space Ghost: Yeah, I bet you did. You and that creepy Elvira woman, pawwing each other. Yuck!

Chad Ghostal: Oh, forget that chick, Taddy Bear, I already did. I'm looking for some new action, you dig? Some new kicks, know what I mean, butterbean?

Space Ghost: Not a whiff, Chad.

Chad Ghostal: Then let me clue ya, Tadville. I want to host the show again. (evil laugh)

Space Ghost: Oh no, no no no no no!

Chad Ghostal: Okay Tad, be that way. Now I'm glad I left that surprise for you in your futon this morning. (evil laugh) B'da b'da! (evil laugh)

Space Ghost: Oh, that was you, huh?

Chad Ghostal: Well, I'll be in touch. Later, cats 'n kittens! (purrs) (barks)

Moltar & Zorak: (in unison) Bye, Chad!

Zorak: I like your brother.

Space Ghost: You do not!

Judy Tenuta: (reappears on monitor) Look at my cheekbones!

Space Ghost: Aaaaah! Moltar, break!

Tansut: (groans) Ten pounds of sausage in a five pound sack!

Moltar: Tansut!

Tansut: Oh, uh, coming up next, more stuff!



Tansut: (sings) Welcome back! (normal voice) Oooh! Hey! I nailed that one!

Space Ghost: (Ding dong!) What now, Birdman?

Moltar: Relax, man, it's Bobcat. He's cool. (Bobcat is on control room monitor, waves at Moltar)

Space Ghost: Ladies and gentlemen, it's special anniversary guest Bobcat Goldthwait.

Bobcat Goldthwait: I tell ya, it's really been great here, to be back here, Space Ghost.

Space Ghost: It's great to have you. So, it's my 37th show anniversary, Bobcat.

Bobcat Goldthwait: You should slap yourself on the back.

Zorak: He should slap himself in the face.

Space Ghost: (slaps himself in the face)

Bobcat Goldthwait: (laugh, then shrieking laugh, then starts to cry)

Space Ghost: So, Bob-a-rella, did ya bring me anything special for my anniversary?

Bobcat Goldthwait: Oh, I brought you many things. (pause)

Space Ghost: (smiles at camera)

Bobcat Goldthwait: I'm lyin', man, what can I get ya, you don't even wear slacks or trousers or pants, you know...

Space Ghost: Oh, that's okay, just as long as you don't sing me a stupid song or anything.

Bobcat Goldthwait: (starts making gibbering noises, shaking his head back and forth)

Moltar: Look out, I think he's gonna sing!

Space Ghost: He's not gonna sing, Moltar. You're.. not gonna sing, are you, Bobcat?

Bobcat Goldthwait: Yes I am.

Space Ghost: Ohhh brother.

Zorak: Sing! Sing, you fool! Sing like a maniac! (shakes his arm)


Space Ghost: (sighs)

Bobcat Goldthwait: Could you buy the sincerity of that? Yeah, I, it really worked for me.

Zorak: Hmmmm, it had a good beat, and I could kill you to it. I give it a 75. (holding a sign with "75")

Bobcat Goldthwait: I'm tellin' ya, I'm gonna get up, and I'm gonna dope-slap that bug.

Moltar: Fine! Fine!

Space Ghost: Be my guest, Bobcat! Dope-slap away!

Bobcat Goldthwait: Zorak, I'm gonna dope-slap ya!

Zorak: (mocking) O-o-o-o-h, I'm so frightened!

Bobcat Goldthwait: (makes face at Zorak) (to Space Ghost) How did you get a show with a cricket?

Zorak: I'm a loc-, er, mantis!

Bobcat Goldthwait: Apparently, in, somewhere in show business, you shoulda went paper instead of scissors.

Zorak: Yeah, look who's talking, the talk show arsonist!

Bobcat Goldthwait: I'm serious, I will, I will clean that bug's clock so fast!

Space Ghost: Zorak!

Bobcat Goldthwait: You just tell him that, I, I, I personally put two of the Bugaloos in the hospital.

Space Ghost: I think he heard you.

Bobcat Goldthwait: (exaggerated wink)

Space Ghost: Um, look, Bobby-cat, I apologize about the bug.

Bobcat Goldthwait: Alright. Yah-yah-yah-yah-yah-yah-yah!

Space Ghost: I try to make him behave, but...

Bobcat Goldthwait: (looks to his right) Am I done, is that enough community service? (looks front and nods)

Space Ghost: (sighs) Any last words of anniversary wisdom for the little people at home?

Bobcat Goldthwait: Yeah. (pounds fist into his palm) You gotta make your own fun, Space Ghost.

Space Ghost: Great.

Bobcat Goldthwait: You gotta make your own fun.

Space Ghost: I tried to make my own fun, look what it got me! Happy anniversary to me!

Bobcat Goldthwait: (sticks his tongue out at Space Ghost)

Space Ghost: Whoop de doo. Moltar, are we done?

Moltar: Uh, we still got that cheap clip thing.

Space Ghost: That's right! This should be great, folks. It's a sparkling career retrospective to me! Space Ghost! Roll 'em!

Moltar: (throws lever, countdown begins)

(Title screen shows: "OUR MAN SPACE GHOST / THE DIRECTOR'S CUT", followed by numerous "Space Ghost" cartoon clips of him getting blasted, pounded, frozen, slammed, by numerous enemies)

Moltar: (laughs)

Zorak: (laughs)

Space Ghost: That was no sparkling tribute! That was terrible! That was... yuck! What in the name of Vic Tayback was that?

Moltar: A montage.

Space Ghost: (French voice) Montage! French, hah? Well, that explains that, no, Moltar? (normal voice) Those French, they ruin everything! I mean, you give them an entire Disneyland, and they can't even make a dime off it. Even purple-butted baboons couldn't screw up a Disneyland! Hmmm! I tell ya, one day I oughta do somethin' about them French.

Zorak: (French voice) I dare you! I double dare you!

Space Ghost: Okay, I will! See if I don't! (flies off)

Bobcat Goldthwait: (still making faces on the monitor)

(Phantom Cruiser flying in space)

Space Ghost: (in cockpit) Ruin my anniversary, will ya?

(Night scene of Paris, Eiffel Tower in center)

Voice: (with French accent) Look out! It is zee Space Ghost! (Phantom Cruiser ray blasts city)

Space Ghost: Take that, you cheese eaters!

(Blasts city again, crisps Eiffel tower; blast city around Arc de Triomphe, city is in flames, people are screaming)

Zorak: (French voice) Well, zat ees zat! Au reservoir, mon-sewers!

Moltar: Bon soir! (throws lever, clip of Space Ghost being pounded into the ground reappears on monitor; title: Fin)

(Credits roll)

(French accordion music in background)

Tansut: (in French voice) You've been watching the Space Ghost Anniversary Spectacular-mathon, celebrating thirty-seven or so episodes of talk show whatchamacallit. From all of us here, to all of you, bon oui, what you say, a good night.

Bobcat Goldthwait: (shrieking laugh)

Judy Tenuta
Bobcat Goldthwait
Evan Dorkin
Sarah Dyer
Bill Wilner
(inverted) Tom Roche
Sonny Sharrock
Eddie Horst
Sonny Sharrock
Lance Carter
Eddie Horst
Alfrieda Gerald
George Lowe
C. Martin Croker
Don Kennedy
Brad Abelle
Big Deal Cartoons
C. Martin Croker
Derald Hunt
Randall Lane
Roy Clements
Butch Seibert
Paul Markowski
Chuck Brock
Dave Sillman
Tim Schnack
Don Bowens
Kaili Rubin
Vishal Roney
Gill Austin
Gus Jordan
Maya McClure
Isabel Gonzalez
Nathan Cook
Hanna Barbera
Carolina Pictures
Monika Nikore
Lori Erwin
Alex Toth
Greg Harrison
Jim Fortier
Pete Smith
Andy Merrill
Chip Duffey
Dave Willis
Keith Crofford
Michael Lazzo

© 1997 Cartoon Network, Inc. All rights reserved.
Animated Characters TM & © 1966 Hanna Barbera Productions, Inc.
All Rights reserved.

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