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Episode: | 53 |
---|---|
Title: | Dam |
Original Air Date: | December 4, 1997 |
Guest Star: | Charlton Heston |
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BEGIN TRANSMISSION
(Space Ghost is flying in the Phantom Cruiser, listening to a self-help tape)
Voice: And so it's easy to see why superheroes are at a crossroads. Driven to succeed, yet encumbered by images of the traditional superhero icon, increasingly at odds with today's societal structure.
Space Ghost: Tell me about it.
Voice: Following are my seven superhero salvos for success. Repeat these at will.
Space Ghost: Alright.
Voice: Number one: I am in charge.
Space Ghost: I am in charge.
Voice: Number two: Mine is an energy that I choose to share.
Space Ghost: Mine is an energy that I choose to share.
Voice: Number three: Remember, no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
(Phantom Cruiser starts making strange noises)
Space Ghost: Oh, what's that?
Voice: Number four: There's no telling when your time will come.
Space Ghost: ????. come on. Come on, baby, don't do this to me today. I can't handle it.
Voice: Number five: love the moment...
Space Ghost: Shut up, you stupid tape!
(Opening theme & titles)
Space Ghost: (invisos in) Greetings, citizens! I'm Space Ghost. Joining me tonight is Acadamy Award winning actor, Charlton Heston.
Zorak: (in background) I'm coppin' an attitude!
Space Ghost: What?
Zorak: Tonight! I'm coppin' an attitude!
Space Ghost: Fine, go ahead.
Moltar: I'm coppin' one too!
Space Ghost: Oh, really.
Moltar: You bet! I am coppin' an attitude! (monitor shows text:)
BOAKE TACKMAN
RUBY GENTRY '52
Space Ghost: That's good.
Moltar: I've had enough, and I'm not takin' anymore!
Zorak: That's right! We're layin' it down!
Moltar: And ain't no way, no how are you gonna tell me different!
Space Ghost: Okay.
Zorak: We're settin' the tone, baby!
Moltar: That's right! That is the way it's gonna be, friend! And if you don't like it...
Zorak: You know what you can do!
Moltar: (evil laugh) I heard that!
Zorak: Oh yeah!
Space Ghost: I'm gonna go to the desk, okay?
Zorak: Go on, try, see what you get!
Space Ghost: (invisos to desk) Here I am now, at the desk.
Moltar: You got lucky, pal! (monitor shows text:)
COLT SAUNDERS
THREE VIOLENT PEOPLE '56
Zorak: You try it next time, you see what you get!
Space Ghost: Villains, listen to me.
Zorak: No.
Space Ghost: Try as you may, you will not knock my moon out of orbit and upset my tides of well-being-ness.
Moltar: What are you talking about?
Space Ghost: Space Ghost of the Cosmos is now perfect... serene... (monitor shows text:)
CHRYSAGON
THE WAR LORD '65
Zorak: Stupid!
Space Ghost: ... and centered. Let's all synchronize our hearts.
Zorak: No!
Space Ghost: Moltar? I am ready to receive my guest.
Moltar: (mutters) All right. (throws lever, sends Charlton to studio monitor)
Space Ghost: Greetings, citizen.
Charlton Heston: (lowering from ceiling) Greetings, Space Ghost.
Space Ghost: Go on, tell everyone who you are.
Charlton Heston: (silent)
Space Ghost: Come on.
Charlton Heston: I am Charlton Heston.
Space Ghost: Yes! Our first Academy Award winner.
Charlton Heston: Really?
Space Ghost: Really.
Charlton Heston: Wow.
Space Ghost: You think the Academy would honor me for my talk show work?
Charlton Heston: Um... let me be honest with you. I don't think so.
Space Ghost: I want one of those trophies, Carlton.
Charlton Heston: Okay, you do?
Space Ghost: I want your trophy. Get it!
Charlton Heston: Okay, okay.
Space Ghost: Wooooo!! All right! Look at me! Oscar winner Space Ghost! Woo Hoo!
Voice: (The vain man glorfies himself, while the self-actualized individual glorifies others.)
Space Ghost: Oh, okay. Chuck, you too are pretty good. I... can call you Chuck, can't I?
Charlton Heston: You bet, you bet.
Space Ghost: How about Chuckles?
Charlton Heston: If you insist.
Space Ghost: Oh, oh oh, wait wait wait, how about Cheston? See, it's a cross between your first name, which is Charlton, and your second name...
Charlton Heston: Um, no. I don't think so.
Space Ghost: (pause) Never say "no, I don't think so". Try saying "yes, I think so".
Charlton Heston: Oh, I see.
Space Ghost: The word "impossible" is a mistake, Chuck. It's really "I'm possible". (smile sparkles)
Charlton Heston: You're all by yourself?
Space Ghost: I've got my enemies here. But... you know... no friends.
Moltar: That's right!
Zorak: I ain't his friend! (monitor shows text:)
PEER GYNT '41
Moltar: If you were to ask me if I were his friend, I would say "No!" to you.
Zorak: I heard that!
Charlton Heston: Doesn't it get lonely?
Space Ghost: I go to parties.
Charlton Heston: Oh, you go to parties?
Space Ghost: In my head.
Charlton Heston: Yeah, I sense there's a hidden identity there.
Space Ghost: There's a party all the time there. Sometimes the neighbors up there complain, so I try to turn down the music. Only I can't. Because there are no knobs there.
Charlton Heston: No, no, I understand, I'm, that's, that's fine. That.. let's let it pass.
Space Ghost: What's wrong? What's that? We're out of punch? I'll be right back.
Moltar: Uh, who're you talkin' to?
Space Ghost: I'm back. It turns out I have an unlimited supply of punch.
Moltar: I want some punch.
Space Ghost: For the parties.
Charlton Heston: Okay.
Space Ghost: In my head.
Zorak: (sighs) Get on with the show!
Space Ghost: Are you gettin' enough oxygen, Chuck?
Charlton Heston: Absolutely, I breathe very well in many atmospheres.
Space Ghost: Including the Planet of the Apes? They say there's nothing more fragrant than a hot ape.
Charlton Heston: The odd thing about that movie, was all the gorillas sat at lunch...
Space Ghost: (starts laughing)
Charlton Heston: This is no kidding, this is honest truth.
Space Ghost: Oh, really?
Charlton Heston: All the gorillas sat at one table at lunch, and all the chimpanzees sat at another, and all the orangutans sat at another.
Zorak: (while Charlton is talking) Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Space Ghost: (to Zorak) Hey, cut it out!
Charlton Heston: And, uh, the humans were ????...
Moltar: (while Charlton is talking) Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Space Ghost: Stop it!! I'm afraid my sidekicks are copping an attitude, Chuck.
Charlton Heston: Oh, I see.
Zorak: (continues making noise)
Moltar: (does the same)
(continue to make noises as they talk)
Space Ghost: Been doin' this all day in here.
Charlton Heston: Yeah, that's clear, that's clear.
Space Ghost: Breathe with me, Charlton.
Charlton Heston: Okay.
Space Ghost: (takes deep breath, then exhales) Weather the storm.
Charlton Heston: Okay.
Voice: (Away with confusion.)
Space Ghost: Aaaaaaa! (aims his power band at Zorak)
Zorak: Aa aa aa aa! Remember, vengeance is the refuge of the weak.
Voice: (He's right, Space Ghost.)
Space Ghost: Let me just give him one.
Voice: (No, rise above the fray.)
Zorak: Listen to her.
Voice: (You're not trying.)
Space Ghost: Can I just...
Voice: (No.)
Space Ghost: Just one?
Voice: (No.)
Space Ghost: (sighs) Fine.
Charlton Heston: (gets zapped by Zorak) Oh, oh! Don't do that, don't do...
Space Ghost: Little green freak! (blasts Zorak)
Zorak: Hey, what, no... Aaaah!! (Blam!)
Voice: (Vengeance is the refuge of the weak.)
Space Ghost: (puts his hand over his face) I know.
Zorak: (crisped) (coughs) Idiot! (coughs)
Space Ghost: All existence is chaos, Chuck. The self-empowered man realizes this...
Charlton Heston: Uh huh.
Space Ghost: ... and rises like an eagle above the tangled teaming masses.
Charlton Heston: Wow.
Space Ghost: Talons out, ready to swoop.
Charlton Heston: You're very perceptive, Space Ghost, I wouldn't have...
Space Ghost: ... thought that I had a new age spirituality? Well, surprise, Chuck, I'm a 90's guy.
Charlton Heston: Did you have any, uh...
Zorak: Talent?
Charlton Heston: ... how can I put it...
Zorak: Class? Intelligence?
Charlton Heston: Formal education?
Space Ghost: Define "formal"
Charlton Heston: I don't want to...
Moltar: (throws lever, Charlton starts talking at double speed, monitor shows text:)
SAT 12
DATA ALGORITHM
COMPRESSION
Zorak: (laughs)
Moltar: (laughs)
Space Ghost: Oh, that's mature!
Zorak: Slow him down! Make him sound creepy!
Moltar: (throws lever again, monitor text changes to
SAT 12
DATA ALGORITHM
EXPAND
and Charlton starts talking at half speed)
Zorak: (continues laughing)
Moltar: (continues laughing)
Space Ghost: (as Charlton moves his mouth in slow motion) Man, look at those teeth! Hey, wait a minute, is that...
Zorak: Spinach!
Space Ghost: (zaps Charlton on monitor, returning him to normal speed) Ya don't floss, do you, Chuck?
Charlton Heston: You caught me. Not regularly.
Space Ghost: Busted! I can spot an unflossed mouth from two miles away! That's one of my powers.
Charlton Heston: I suppose, yeah, okay, okay, no, I don't floss as regularly as I should.
Space Ghost: I don't talk about that power much. Not really one of my good powers, but still a power all the same.
Charlton Heston: Uh, you're, you seem perfectly fluent in English, can you read?
Zorak: No.
Space Ghost: I like books on tape.
Charlton Heston: Oh, no no no no, we can do better than that, what about Shakespeare?
Space Ghost: What about books on tape?
Zorak: No.
Charlton Heston: No, nope. Shakespeare, that's the best of them all. You know Shakespeare.
Zorak: Nope.
Space Ghost: Not personally.
Charlton Heston: No... (puts his hand to his face) You know the writings of Shakespeare.
Space Ghost: We didn't have the theatre when I grew up, Chuck. We had hard work. Long days, mending the nets. Scaling the fish. No part of the fish was wasted, Chuck. We used the entire fish.
Charlton Heston: You sure, really, no kidding?
Space Ghost: (laughs) Of course I'm kidding!
Charlton Heston: Oh.
Space Ghost: (laughs) Fishing in space! Tell me, Chuck, ever thought of starring in a sequel to "The Ten Commandmants"?
Zorak: No.
Charlton Heston: Uh, I don't think so.
Space Ghost: Not a sequel man, eh?
Zorak: No.
Charlton Heston: What other commandments are we gonna write?
Zorak: Thou that smelled it thine own self dealt it.
Space Ghost: (laughs) Thou that smelled it thine own self dealt it.
Zorak: (fake laugh) Jerk.
Charlton Heston: Yeah, well...
Moltar: Thou shalt not... hesistate.
Charlton Heston: I'm kinda committed to the first ten.
Zorak: Thou shalt not be committed to old commandments!
Space Ghost: Zorak, one more commandment out of you, and thou shalt be blasted.
Moltar: Thou shalt not mess with Zorak, or thou shalt have to mess with me!
Space Ghost: All right, everybody, just calm down!
Moltar: Thou shalt not calm down!
Charlton Heston: I hesitate...
Moltar: Thou shalt not hesitate!!
Space Ghost: (blasts Moltar with his power bands)
Moltar: (laying on his back) Ohhhhh boy...
Zorak: Uh oh, now you've done it!
Moltar: We're now going to initiate the silent treatment. (monitor shows text:)
CHRYSAGON
THE WAR LORD '65
Zorak: I ain't saying jack!
Space Ghost: Fine. Good.
Moltar: As of right now, my friend... silence. (monitor shows text:)
COLT SAUNDERS
THREE VIOLENT PEOPLE '56
Space Ghost: (waits for them to say something)
Zorak: (silence)
Space Ghost: You guys aren't really gonna do this? (total silence) Come on, guys!
Zorak: (silence)
Space Ghost: Hey, come on!
Moltar: (silence)
Space Ghost: Chuck, you're not doin' this too, are ya?
Charlton Heston: (nods)
Space Ghost: Oh, man! (pause) Anybody want ice cream? Zorak? Ice cream?
Zorak: (silence)
Space Ghost: My treat. Moltar?
Moltar: (silence)
Space Ghost: Pistachio. Butter pecan. (as he speaks, monitor shows text:)
PEER GYNT '41
Moltar: (silence)
Space Ghost: Want some gum?
Zorak: Gu-- (wide eyed, then looks away)
Voice: (What are you doing?)
Space Ghost: (quietly) Silent treatment.
Voice: (You don't have time for this. You must destroy the Hoover Dam. It is your destiny.)
Space Ghost: What if I get caught?
Voice: (You're Space Ghost, superhero to millions. Who would suspect you?)
Space Ghost: Yeah, I am Space Ghost. It's my destiny.
Voice: (You better hurry up!)
Space Ghost: What about my pants?
Voice: (What?!)
Space Ghost: My, my, my pants.
Voice: (Your pants are fine. Hurry!)
Space Ghost: Let me just say goodbye to Charlton, okay?
Voice: (Uh uh! Someone's going to beat you to it!)
Space Ghost: All right, all right! (aloud) Uh, Charlton, I gotta go. Pick up the kids. Who are, nnnot in Nevada.
Charlton Heston: Okay, Space Ghost. (waves) Absolutely.
Space Ghost: (flies off)
(Aerial shot, closing in on Hoover Dam, accompanied by dramatic sting music)
INTERRUPT TRANSMISSION
RESUME TRANSMISSION
(Shots of extreme flood damage, police sirens in background)
Space Ghost: (bounds back to his desk; test pattern is on studio monitor) Well, goodnight, everybody, I, I, I gotta split. (flies off again)
(Credits roll)
(Police car screechs up, door opens)
Police Officer: (through bull horn) Hey you!
Space Ghost: No!
Police Officer: Hey, get over here. All right, we're gonna put ya...
Space Ghost: (struggling sounds) Ow!
Police Officer: Take your hands away from your sides.
Space Ghost: It was my destiny, can't you see?
Police Officer: I will not ask you again, sir, please take your hands away from your sides, please.
Space Ghost: This is my inviso belt.
Police Officer: Yeah, right, buddy.
Space Ghost: You're all blind!
Police Officer: Don't struggle with me! You understand?
Space Ghost: Blind pawns, blinded by government and the mass media.
Police Officer: Do not struggle with me, sir.
Space Ghost: You're so blind.
Police Officer: Spread your legs and put your hands on the side of the vehicle, away from the belt.
Space Ghost: (starts crying)
Police Officer: You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. Take the cape from over your face, please.
GUEST STAR Charlton Heston |
WRITERS Randolph Heard Alan Laddie |
EDITORS Jay Edwards Baco Bryles (inverted) Tom Roche |
MUSIC Sonny Sharrock Eddie Horst |
MUSICIANS Sonny Sharrock Lance Carter Eddie Horst Alfrieda Gerald |
VOICES George Lowe C. Martin Croker Cheryl Barbour Dave Willis |
DESIGN COMPANY Big Deal Cartoons |
ANIMATION DIRECTOR C. Martin Croker |
3D ANIMATOR Derald Hunt |
ART DIRECTOR Randall Lane |
DIGITAL COMPOSITOR Dave Sillman |
ON-LINE CONFORM Jay Bellissimo |
AUDIO CONFORM Mark Coddington |
EDIT ASSIST James Dansereau |
RE-RECORDING MIXER Roy Clements |
PRODUCTION MANAGER Kaili Rubin |
PRODUCTION COORDINATOR Vishal Roney |
TALENT COORDINATOR Isabel Gonzalez |
PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS Gus Jordan Maya McClure |
INTERNS James Huffman John Schimansky |
SPACE GHOST'S FORMER MALE SECRETARY Nathan Cook |
SPECIAL THANKS Mark Francis Ben Edlund Townsend Coleman Pat Coddington Ashley Manos Renee King Steve Tseckares |
ORIGINAL SPACE GHOST DESIGN Alex Toth |
LINE PRODUCER Jim Fortier |
PRODUCER Pete Smith |
PRODUCER Andy Merrill |
PRODUCER Chip Duffey |
SUPERVISING PRODUCER Dave Willis |
EXECUTIVE PRODUCER Keith Crofford |
SHOES Michael Lazzo |
© 1997 Cartoon Network, Inc. All rights reserved.
Animated Characters TM & © 1966 Hanna Barbera Productions, Inc.
All Rights reserved.
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